Riders on the Storm

Almost as soon as I begin reading Journey to the East, I have The Doors in my head. As I read I’m immersed in Hesse’s world, imagining the sounds of the book (Eastern, mystic sorts of sounds), but as soon as I’ve closed the book to tend to a child’s need or refill my mug of coffee, there it is, the unmistakable sound of Jim’s deep baritone…

Love me two time baby
Love me twice today
Love me two times girl
I’m goin’ away
Love me two times girl
Once for tomorrow, once just for today
Love me two times
I’m goin’ away 

I haven’t listened to The Doors in years, but I did go through a major Doors phase in my late teens. It was around the same time that I discovered what is probably Hesse’s most famous work, Siddhartha. I loved it. The music I listened to all those years ago, immersed in the pages of Siddhartha, comes flooding back as I turn the pages of The Journey to the East. The book is new to me, but I suppose the spirit of the work and the one who wrote it is connected, somehow, via tangled neural pathways, to my teenage self. And that included Jim, Ray, Robbie and John. And Pam. But mostly Jim.

I pull out the Doors album Alive, She Cried. I have two Doors Albums on vinyl, but this is the one that has the song that keeps playing on repeat in my head, forever linked, I suppose, with the words of Herman Hesse. The first track on this album is Gloria. This is significant, because it’s also the first track on Patti’s album Horses. I take it as a sign, pull the old record from its sleeve and put it on the record player.

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People often speak of how the sense of smell is one of the most powerful memory triggers. How scents from our past linger in our brains, just waiting to bring past worlds flooding to our awareness when smelled again. Everyone says it’s so, and I believe it. But it’s never happened to me. I remember particular scents and smells of childhood, but they’ve never caused memories to pop up out of the blue. Music, though, will bring back long-forgotten memories in vivid detail. Many of my memories seem inseparable from the music that accompanied them. The soundtrack of my life. First kisses, family gatherings, bus rides to sporting events. Church pews and back roads, driving my first car, a red Acura Integra. Stick shift. Blasting The Doors.

The music of The Doors brings me back to my late teens. And I didn’t just listen to the music. In my typical obsessive way I read every book related to them I could get my hands on. I must have watched the movie with Val Kilmer as Jim Morrison 20 times. Maybe more. I dreamed of visiting the Père Lachaise Cemetery in Paris to visit the grave of Jim Morrison. I would leave a poem, a flower. Light a candle.

Patti Smith often visits the graves of the masters, tenderly cleaning and tending the graves, leaving offerings, and of course, taking photographs with her Polaroid.

As I’m reading The Journey to the East, and the narrator, H.H., is describing the mystical journey of the League, this sentence captures me:

We visited and honored all sacred places and monuments, churches and consecrated tombstones which we came across on our way; chapels and alters were adorned with flowers; ruins were honored with songs or silent contemplation; the dead were commemorated with music and prayers. 

I thought of Patti Smith and her collection of photographs of tombstones and graves visited. Repects paid. Devotion to her craft and those who came before. I was reminded of my youthful desire to visit Jim Morrison’s grave. And now, some 20 years later, I understand this impulse in a new way. I never went to France, and the list of graves I’d like to visit one day has grown. Changed. Like me. Like everything.

When H.H. speaks of the member of the League, and their goals for the journey, he writes that each

carried his own fond childhood dream within his heart as a source of inner strength and comfort. 

Not long into the book it becomes clear that the “journey” defies geograhpy and time. It’s so much more than that.

 

The Journey to the East

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“One paradox, however, must be accepted and this is that it is necessary to continually attempt the seemingly impossible.”

I didn’t really choose Herman Hesse’s Journey to the East to be the first of Patti’s favorite books I would read. It was the first one I found at our local cooperative bookstore when I checked the classics shelves for any titles on my list. Our community bookstore is fantastic, almost entirely volunteer run, of which I am one. I love my dreamy days at the bookstore. It has always been a secret wish of mine, to work in a small, local bookstore. When our small town bookstore declared it was going out of business I, along with many others, was devastated. No! Not the bookstore. A group of inspired and dedicated people came together and found a way for this beloved downtown establishment to continue. Now it is a community-owned cooperative and thriving.

As I browsed the classics section with my handwritten list of Patti’s favorite books in hand, Hesse’s The Journey to the East was the first one I saw. Followed shortly by Moby Dick. I bought them both.

The next day, after finishing the novel I was already reading, I opened The Journey to the East. I read the opening line, “It was my destiny to join in a great experience” and knew that this was the perfect book to begin my journey into the literature that inspired the Grandmother of Punk. Every turn of a page served to confirm and reinforce that belief.

It doesn’t take long to realize it’s not the journey you think it’s going to be.

Nothing ever is.

On Beginning Something New

It was around the time the chicken lost her feet that I fell into devotion with Patti. Devotion to learning from her life’s work (as a mother, poet, songwriter, performer, singer, writer and general badass), as I’m working on mine. To allowing whatever creative jumble of words and music might pour forth if I opened myself. To diving into the process of writing and music without fear. Not that the chicken’s feet had anything to do with that, but these sorts of farm life events are useful markers for the passage of time. Like remembering an event that happened the summer the old sheep died. Or when the dog was still a puppy. That was when the garden plot was over there. The spring we planted the flowering crab apple.

I was in the midst of my first attempts at songwriting, spending hours at my beloved writing desk, pen or guitar in hand, when we found her. It was the little barred rock that one of our hens hatched and raised this summer. She was wedged between a fence and a wooden compost bin constructed from old pallets. I wasn’t sure if she was still alive at first. Turns out she was, but had spent a cold winter night outside with her feet stuck at odd angles in the fence, rather than tucked away under her fluffy feathers as they should have been. She could not walk, and I was not sure if she would live. We brought her inside, suspecting frostbite, and began to nurse her back to health. And we watched her feet turn black. Nothing could have prepared me for the day I walked in and found one of her feet on the tiled bathroom floor. She ended up losing them both, and to my surprise, adjusted quickly to life on peg legs. As soon as the dead, frostbitten feet fell off she was happy and moving around like she had not since before the injury. Now she’s my music room chicken. She loves to hang out behind the drum kit, and often comes to sit under my chair as I write at my desk. Here she is. My writing partner.

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One piece of advice often given to aspiring songwriters and musicians is to dig deep into the inspirations of those who inspire you. Listen to who you love. And then listen to who they loved. The artists that inspired them. Patti Smith is, understandably, an inspiration to many artists and musicians that I love. I’ve long been aware of her. Of her brilliance. Her importance. Her influence. I read Just Kids about a year ago, and that did it for me. I was in awe. Her writing pulled me in. Her persona. Everything about her. I let myself become immersed in her words, in her world, and only reluctantly surfaced when the last page was read. I had found the fantasy mentor I didn’t know I was looking for. And to learn from Patti, to trace her roots and all that shaped who she is as an artist today, I think you have to follow her trail through her beloved authors and poets.

Fast forward a few months, and I was finally listening to the desperate call from within to write my own songs. I read through another book of Patti’s, M Train, jotting down all the books that are a part of her world that I would like to read. I set her small book Devotion down on the table in front of me as I wrote at the coffee shop – an unintentional alter to the Grandmother of Punk. Like Patti, I’ve always loved books. And not just reading books. Books themselves. I dove into the classics as a teen, transported to all of the places in the pages. Swept away by the Bronte’s and Austen, enchanted by Shakespeare.

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“I’m going to remember everything and then I’m going to write it down. An aria to a coat. A requiem for a cafe.” – Patti Smith, M Train

Later that day, back at my desk, I set the same book, along with her album Horses, on the shelf of my antique secretary writing desk. Maybe she’ll keep me focused. And allow me to wander. Watch over me as I find my own voice as a writer. I also decided that I will read through the books she loves, one by one, as I write and work on my own music. I started creating a list, compiled from my own reading of her books and a useful internet search that yielded this list. I ended up with a list of over eighty books! I don’t know if I’ll read them all, but I hope to. A few will be re-reads, but by far the majority are books I have not yet read.

I don’t plan on posting the usual sort of book review. That’s been done. But I couldn’t imagine an undertaking like this without writing about it. I plan on writing about my experiences while reading through Patti’s favorite books, and about how my own creative process is affected and touched by them.

And maybe a little about chickens and cats and kids (the human kind).

Feathers are now a common sight on my music room floor. I pick one up and place it, carefully, by Devotion. A new altar, to a new beginning.

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Up next, The List.